A fast-paced, thrilling horror novel that follows a group of heroines to die for, from the brilliant New York Times bestselling author of The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires. In horror movies, the final girl is the one who's left standing when the credits roll. The one who fought back, defeated the killer, and avenged her friends. The one who emerges bloodied but victorious, a victim and a hero. But after the sirens fade and the audience...

Jackie is the 'saddest living person in the entire world'... according to a mysterious team of alien abductors. To these extraterrestrial shape-shifters, he is an emotional superstar, his misery by far superseding his earthly musical celebrity. Hoping to master this quintessential human emotion, they force him to perform his sadness over and over again. Until just like that, he is returned to his old life. Trying to comprehend what happened, he joins...