Jared Goldsmith

Meet Timmy Failure, the founder, president, and CEO of the best detective agency in town, probably the nation. And his lazy sidekick, Total, a 1,500-pound polar bear.

His name is Failure. Timmy Failure. And his detective agency is on the verge of global domination. Global riches. Global fame. And yet the gods keep throwing him curveballs for starters, academic probation. The coveted Miracle Report is the key to everything, including a good grade. It's dirty business. It's best you know nothing. But one thing is for sure that Timmy Failure will be triumphant again!

When boring Mr. Loring retires, A.J.'s class gets a new music teacher who raps, break-dances, and thinks he has what it takes to become a famous musician.

The new lunch lady at Ella Mentry School, Ms. LaGrange, writes secret messages in the mashed potatoes and tries her best to get A.J. and the other students to eat healthy foods.

Mrs. Cooney, the school nurse, is so beautiful that A.J. has a crush on her--even though he suspects she might be an international spy!

Envy turns to admiration and finally to friendship for Goat and Unicorn.

When the hippie crossing guard, Mr. Louie, puts a love potion in the water fountain before Valentine's Day, everyone at Ella Mentry School falls in love.

Famous children's author Suki Kabuki and her pet raptor, Rappy, wreak havoc during a visit to Ella Mentry School.

A school trip to the natural history museum goes awry when the curator, Ms. Krup, loses her giant cockroach and A.J. and his friends decide to explore the museum in the middle of the night.

Mr. Macky dresses up as Abraham Lincoln to get the students at Ella Mentry School excited about their Presidents' Day oral reports.